The County CPS

My son came home from school one day
With a smirk upon his face.
He'd decided he was smart enough,
To put me in my place.

In social science class today,
Taught by Missus Fikes
We learned about the latest laws,
the Children's Bill of Rights.

It says I need not clean my room,
You can't dictate my hair.
No one can tell me what to think,
Or speak or what to wear.

I can play my raucus music
As loud as it will go
And if you try to turn it down,
It shows you're just too old.

I have freedom from religion,
And regardless what you say,
I don't have to bow my head,
And I sure don't have to pray.

I'll wear earrings where I want,
I'll pierce my tongue and nose.
I'll watch and play the stuff I want,
And get tattoos from neck to toes.

And don't you ever spank me,
Or you'll be serving time,
But I can beat and bully others --
For me it's not a crime.

Don't you ever touch me,
My body's only for my use,
I don't want your hugs and kisses,
That's just more child abuse.

Don't preach about God's morals,
Like your mama did to you.
That's nothing more than mind control,
And it's illegal, too.

Mom, we have these children's rights,
So you best not mess with us.
Or we'll call Child Protection,
Better known as C.P.S.

There is no Constitution now
It don't apply to us.
The Bill of Rights does not apply
So says the C.P.S.

The Ten Commandments are a myth
You can't enslave my mind.
I'm free to disobey you
The law is on my side.

Don't talk about the old days
Or the history of our land.
You know those were Dark Ages.
Over me you can't command.

We owe you no respect because
Our wants you haven't filled
And the 'sacrifices' you have made for us,
They just don't fit the bill.

As a parent you're a failure
You've really made a mess.
It's a wonder we don't turn you in,
To the county C.P.S.